Saturday, April 24, 2010


Yep. You know it. It's time again for another ridiculous conversation with my lil sis Julie.

Today's nonsensical topic?

Nursery Rhymes/Lullabys

Me: Hey. You know that song about the mulberry bush and weasel and something goes pop?

Julie: Um, Pop goes the Weasle?

Me: Right. Yeah that. *singing* "All around the mulberry bush the pumpkin chased the weeeeasle."

Julie: Did you just say pumpkin?

Me: I did. It chased the weasle.

Julie: If by pumpkin you mean MONKEY.

Me: Oh right! Monkey. Not pumpkin.

Julie: You're ridiculous.

Me: Pumpkin, monkey--same thing.

Julie: Definitely not.

Me: Whatever. All around the mulberry bush the pumpkin chased the weasle, one of the two i dont quite remember thought it was all in the fun, POP goes the weasle.

Julie: WHAT? First of all, I just said it was MONKEY and you definitely said PUMPKIN again. It's Monkey. MON. KEY. And it was the MONKEY that thought it was all in the fun.

Me: Picky, about that monkey and which one of those two thought it was all in the fun?

Julie: The monkey.

Me: Right. So...what was the Pop! about? Did the monkey bonk that weasle on the head for shits and giggles and that's what the pop is? OR did the weasle get super irritated with the monkey and was like GET UP OUT MY SHIT YOU DUMBASS MONKEY and when the monkey didn't stop chasing him, the weasle was like POP! as in he put a cap in the monkey's ass?

Julie: Are we really having this conversation?

Me: Yes. Now I want an answer.

Julie: The weasle clearly hit the monkey.

Me: The weasle should go to anger management. Such violent song. People complain about violence in rap music--well i think it's safe to say we should shift that energy to kids songs.

Julie: For real. Like all of them are about something terrible.

Me: Such as..?

Julie: London bridge is falling down, Rockabye Baby, Ring around the Rosie...

Me: I thought of one that's not! The one that no one knows the words to. Lullaby and goodnight and no one knows the words to this song...

Julie: That song is creepy. Like a lifetime movie when someone steals a baby. You can hear them singing softly, "lullabbbbbbbbbbbbyyyy aaaaaaaand gooooooooodniiiiiiiiightttt" all slow and creepy like. Then Linda Hamilton is stuck spending the next 90 minutes finding her baby...

Me: You're crazy.

Julie: But I'm right. Tune into lifetime sometime...Anyways, all lullabys are creepy and violent.I'm not singing them to MY kids if i have them.

Me: What are you are you going to sing to them instead? You listen to Queen, Billy Joel, and pot smoking artists. You're gonna be over the crib singing "Beelzebub has a devil put aside for meeeeeeee for meeeeeee for MEEEEEEEEEEE!" or "Sing us a song you're the piano man! Sing us a song tonight!"

Julie: Better than your horrible mix of music. "Womanizer woman-womanizer OH womanizer OH you're a womanizer baby" or "Bend over to the front touch your toes" That's not appropriate either.

Me: I think we'll leave it to Lisa [our big sis] to have all the kids in the family...

Monday, April 19, 2010

How Could You Be So Heartless?

Yep. And yet another animal hating statement from yours truly.

I dont actually hate animals though. I just dont get the big flipping deal about certain ones.

Like deer. (and obviously owls b/c of my previous entry)

I dont know how or why this even came up but when i was at the boys' house on sat night, the subject of deer came up and i expressed my enormous apathy for deer.

(Oh wait, I remember. Someone on tv was wearing a john deer shirt and i said i dont like johns and i dont like deer so john deer is out of the question for me. And being that im a minority, I think that's quite alright.)

Anyways, my friend tried to pull the Bambi card out on me to appeal to my emotions. He was like "Humans killed Bambi's mother Sally" and i was like oh puh-lease. Not gonna work!

Seriously? I used to feel the same way everyone does about Disney's Bambi.

You know, OMG THEY KILLED BAMBIS MOTHER!!! ::cue tears and avoiding watching that movie on purpose ever again::

But guess what kiddos? Deer? They're like totally playing the victim.

Seriously! Just think about it...

Like dude, how would YOU feel if Disney made a movie about an adorable little kid who's mother is driving home from dropping him off somewhere and her car gets HIT by a deer and she dies? And there's no baby's daddy so now he's an orphan?

Yeah. Exactly.

And as for the "I'm a vegetarian b/c killing animals to eat meat is mean" people. I bring you some lyrics from NOFX's song "Shut Up Already":

"Affection not dissection meat is murder animals are for petting
oh shut up already I'm tired of you whining
about poor little animals dying and the food they are supplying
because if a big animal had he chance
it wouldn't take another glance it would eat you up"

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Bye Bye Birdie

OK! Soooooooo

There's this owl outside of my window and it's been here for the past week and a half. I can't see where it's sitting anymore but i can damn well hear the little bastard.


Some nights it's not so bad.

Last night it was AWFUL.

So I get in last night around 2 something in the morning from the boys' house and ready to pass out when i hear WHOOOOOOOOO WHOOOOOO WHOOOOOOOOOOO WHOO WHO WHO WHO WHO WHOOOOOOOOOO WHO WHOOOOOOOO! I'm like seriously?! But i put my pillow over my head and hope the owl shuts up.

But naturally as it goes in these types of doesnt.

The next half an hour just a constant WHOOOOOOO WHOOOOOOOOO WHO WHO WHOOOOO!

I snapped.


....I think I need sleep to be nice Sally....

Friday, April 16, 2010

I'm A Slaaaaaaaaave....For you....


This whole defriending on facebook is nonsense. NONSENSE. People have the right to not be your friend if they dont want to be. Sometimes you lose a friend b/c they deactivated their account. Sometimes, it's not even personal b/c it's haven't talked to them since you had class with them....4 years ago. And sometimes, someone just doesn't like you. That happens in life ladies and gentlement.

No one has to be your friend and you dont have to be anyone's and the anxiety and anger that people get from defriending and being defriended is ridiculous.

ITS A FRIGGIN INTERNET WEBSITE YO!!! Are you really taking it that seriously!?

You are all lovely people who have the right to be friends with or not be friends with whoever you want and certainly a social media application shouldn't dictate such.

Personally, I'm not anyone's bitch or slave.

....unless he's really cute... ;)


Monday, April 12, 2010

Bird Bird Bird. Bird is the Word

11:56 PM me: i'm an odd bird ktj. odd odd odd

Katie: eh im odd too. odd birds get along

11:57 PM me: girl, yes. our feathers stick together! or something like that.
11:58 PM me: oh wait, birds of a feather flock together. d'oh i will never be wise. =(
hahaha dur dur dur, our feathers stick together

Katie: hahahaha
11:59 PM you are a wise one sally
just way beyond your years

me: i mean, maybe their feathers DO stick together!
fml. i just suck at repeating wise sayings


Thursday, April 8, 2010

You Light Up My Life

I swear to you, this little cartoon man in the Ikea "how to assemble" booklet looks like Justin Timberlake putting a lamp together!!! I half expect him to come to life like in A-ha's "Take On Me" video.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Party In the USA

Why I avoid going to parties:

Sunday, April 4, 2010

In Our Family Portrait We Look Pretty Happy


I view my football team like a family. You may not like everyone in it and it may be disfunctional but it's your family at the end of the day.

Now there's a new "father" in town, McNabb, who I guess is taking Campbell's spot and I feel like the bratty child who doesn't like new dad.


Isn't It Ironic...Don't You Think?

Whilst driving to Woodbridge with my older sister Lisa (also endearingly known as The Clam), I couldn't help but notice how the song we were listening to...was very inappropriate given our surroundings.

You should know this about her. She is and always has been and always will be the biggest Michael Jackson fan.

So we're in her car listening to his earth song which is Michael crooning about what have we done to this world and shame on us for the conditions of the environment and shame on big corporate companies.

Lisa's gushing about how much she loves the song and I nod and I'm like eh about the song and I look around while we're listening to this tree hugging song...

And then I couldn't help it. And if you know me well you KNOW i can'thelp it. Sometimes a Sally just gotta say something so i did.

Mid song I turned to her after taking in our surroundings as said...

Me: I don't know how I feel about us listening to this song right now...
Lisa: WHY?!
Me: Well...we're listening to this song about earth and we're on a highway where trees have been knocked down to build this highway, in traffic next to a steel company, drinking the starbucks which is the nectar of corporate giants and I'm smoking a Marlboro Light in your SUV with you iPhone on the dashboard....Isn't it ironic....don't you think?

Thursday, April 1, 2010

You Live You Learn

I checked out my own linked in page to see what the employers are seeing especially since one of them said she googled me.

Obviously I know how to keep my facebook private and I'm not on any other social networking sites. I don't myspace. I don't twitter. I linkin for work and facebook for play (although I'm ready to kick facebook to the curb) and this blog i dont think is searchable.

So imagine my surprise when I see a link next to the space on my LINKEDIN profile that says: My Blog.

And where did that link lead to?



Instead of typing in my portfolio link, I must've typed in my blog link out of habit.