Wednesday, February 18, 2009

It's Family Tradition

"We Are the World" caused quite the controversy when I had dinner with my parents and my older sister.

Since the song is so contemporary and relevant...

I don't know how we got started on it but the next thing I know, one minute I'm twirling my spaghetti around my fork and then the next I'm yelling at my mom for not liking Bruce Springsteen. I don't mind that she doesn't like Kenny Rogers b/c she swears he's a racist. (And she used to be his biggest fan. I'm not sure what her beef with him exactly is but she swears he's a racist...) And I'm only slightly miffed that she doesn't know who Kenny Loggins is until i sang footloose.

My older sister is trying to remember the part after "There's a choice we're making, we're saving our own and me...WTF is that part before fucking...I can't remember! It's a choice we're making..."

My dad is trying to stop my argument with my mom and me...

Mom: I HATE him.
Me: Bruce Springsteen?
Mom: Yes. I didn't watch the superbowl half time b/c i don't like him.
Me: You don't like "The Boss"???
Mom: No, I said I don't like Bruce Springsteen.
Me: He IS the boss. You hate the boss. I can't believe it! YOU hate the boss.
Mom: I don't hate your boss! I'm sure Erick is a very nice man. You said he was. And you said his wife was very nice too.
Me: (pause) Mom no! I'm not talking about MY boss. I'm talking about THE boss.
Dad: I remember the show "Who's the boss" Tony! Angela! Right?
Older sister: "so lets start givin...theres a choice we're making...UGH! what are the words?"
Mom: What's he the boss of?
Me: I don't know!
Mom: Well that's a stupid nick name. He's not even the boss of anything.
Me: Maybe he's the boss of the e street band.
Mom: Who's the E Street Band?
Me: his band i guess. or some band that plays with him.
Mom: So he's their boss?
Mom: Don't use that tone of voice with me I just had a question!
Dad: There was no band in "Who's the Boss."

Older sis busy on iPhone looking up lyrics.
Dad wanders to smoke
Mom and i get in another fight about how to pronounce Lionel Richie.
(I'll save you the drama. It's really quite boring. just a shouting match of me going MOM NO. LI. as in LION. IN AS IN...IN. ULL as in..DULL. LIONEL. and her saying RYAN-ALL. Then dad cutting in to say "OH I get it. Ry-uhn-allllllllll. B/c making the "L" longer at the end of the name makes the imaginary R in the front of the name all better. They can nail the "L" sound at the end, so why not the beginning?? and how fucked up is it that she can say bruce springsteen but cant say lionel??)

And so i chat with my younger sis to remind her of our family's insanity and this is what i get.

SallySocialiteTM (10:53:19 PM): if it makes you feel any better, i fought with mom at dinner b/c she didn't know that bruce springsteen's nick name is "The boss"
SallySocialiteTM (10:53:20 PM): hahah
juliepak 01 (10:55:09 PM): hahaha. .. bruce springsteen...the director?
juliepak 01 (10:55:15 PM): no. the actor.
SallySocialiteTM (10:55:19 PM): SINGER!!!
juliepak 01 (10:55:24 PM): oooh. yeah. the singer!
SallySocialiteTM (10:55:24 PM): he sings
juliepak 01 (10:55:35 PM): i know i know now.
juliepak 01 (10:55:38 PM): curly hair?
SallySocialiteTM (10:55:40 PM): sorta
juliepak 01 (10:55:44 PM): old.
SallySocialiteTM (10:55:44 PM): looks like he needs a bath
SallySocialiteTM (10:55:47 PM): yes!
juliepak 01 (10:55:47 PM): yeah.
SallySocialiteTM (10:55:50 PM): hahahahah
juliepak 01 (10:55:54 PM): i know~ hahah. oops.
SallySocialiteTM (10:56:31 PM): im going to send you a story about what happened at dinner tonight
SallySocialiteTM (10:56:36 PM): reminder this is YOUR family
juliepak 01 (10:56:47 PM): please, don't remind me.
Send Message Failed. Message is too long.
Send Message Failed. Message is too long.
SallySocialiteTM (10:57:28 PM): youve got mail
juliepak 01 (11:00:44 PM): AHAHAHAHAHHAH!
juliepak 01 (11:01:07 PM): why am i not surprised....this is a classic pak family dinner convo.

Couldn't have said it better myself. This is so typical of my family.

....this is why we can never have company join us for dinner...

Monday, February 16, 2009

Cuz Every Little Thing Gonna Be Alright

I can only hope so. I am TRIPPIN lately so if we haven't seen each other/talked to each me. It's safer that way b/c you'll probably end up interacting with a thousand sally's all at once but the front runners of this multipersonality mind fuck is 1.) The Bitch 2.) The Joker 3.) The ADHD Poster Child 4.) The Ideal Candidate for Anger Management and 5.) The Mute.

One thing and one day at a time. Everything in moderation. Eat 5-7 servings of fruits and vegatables. Be kind Rewind.

Blah blah blah.

I'll come full circle again. Eventually. =)

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Say Whaaaaaaa?

He's Just Not That In to You.

I just saw the movie today with the girls. Never read the book. And after that movie, I really don't think I have the desire to.

Don't get me wrong, I really did like that movie in that it was absolutely hysterical, relevant/relatable and somee things that are sooooo true (which is why it was so funny b/c you'll have a moment of 'oh yeah i've done that' or 'yup i've heard that one' or 'i thought that too!).

But if you're going to watch it with even the slightest bit of intention to apply some part of it to your current male/female relationship (or lack there of) scenario-- DONT BOTHER.

Why not?

B/c ultimately you'll be left feeling that he's just not that into you ever and never will be ever, if you hold all those rules to be true. And then the best part is that not only is HE not into you but no one in the male population is but there ARE exceptions to the rules so there are some people who the rules don't apply to but there's no way to distinguish that.

Uhh..Say whaaaaAAaaAAA?

Trust me. If you've seen the movie, then that i just said rings true.

Movie aside and my own personal take on it is that long story short, there are no "rules" when it comes to guys/girls. Just a lot of messy communication. And that everything is subject to change (may it be good or bad).

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Wishing and Hoping and Dreaming and Praying...

That one day I can say honestly and assuredly say: All is well in my world!

And mean it.

I'm sure you guys are sick of hearing as much as I'm sick of saying:
Hi I'm Sally and here's a pile of shit that's going on.

Calling to follow up?

Hi. I'm still Sally and here's additional piles of shit that's going on.

While not every moment is tragic or end of the world awful and does make for entertaining stories...

It's still pretty fucking annoying. Trussssssssssst.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

...One up?

Is super mario the animated video game version of porn star Ron Jeremy?? makes you wonder what they really meant about "one up..." one WHAT? mmm-hmm...

*Post dedicated to stan!*

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Doctor Doctor Won't You Please Prescribe Me Something...

The day and the life of someone else
Cuz I'm a hazard to myself.

Okay that's totally a lie. I am not a hazard to myself and I don't want to especially BE someone else (Which works out great b/c that's impossible).

So whats the problem?

I have...a disease.

Mentionitis. (when you can't stop mentioning a specific someone else in any given coversation/link everything back to that person. )

It's awful.

Friday, February 6, 2009

"Don't be Cruelle" (Cruel)

(Family Guy reference. As you know, I relate everything to family guy but not in that frat boy kinda way. Um no offense to frat boys as many are my friends hahah love you boys!)

What's being cruel? This whole sleep thing. I'm exhausted. I have been for the past few hours. I tried but no completion (that's what she said! hahah maybe i am a fratster...)

So what's on my mind. Famous question.

There's so much swirling around I have no idea where to begin.

I guess here starts the bitching fest.

1.) So much to do, so little time: Yeah and someone should also add, so little funds...! I love being a socialite. Really and truly. It's fun knowing lots of people and knowing that you can flip open your phone or open an empty email to start to write to someone and know that you can scroll through names and names of people. Some closer to me than others but that's definitely not a personal thing. It's just how it goes in life the same way I'm not close to even some of you--which I don't take personally either.

But back to my original point, there's so many of you I wanna hang out and chill with or party or whatever but I am only one person and I'm sure many people will find it hard to believe (even if they do) 1. I dont really like drinking at all to the point where if prohibition came back, I doubt I'd even care or notice. 2. I may be a socialite but damn, I do not have Paris Hilton's bank account. So even if it's just getting coffee or dinner or going out out one night--it's still adds up when people come at you with the "happy hour sally!" or "it's my birthday!" or "i haven't seen you in forever--let's catch up!" All totally legit but all costly. 3. I'm a rather independent creature and love nothing more than to have a 5 stay at home nights perfectly contently not talking to anyone. I talk to people all day everyday that I just like my own time/space to do my own thing.

The problem? I have guilt issues saying no and I think some people think I'm fake b/c i am notorious for going to 5 parties in one night and spending what i call the "curtosy hour or half hour" I'm not fake but I'm just trying to see as many people as possible so I dont have to do one on ones witheverone.

I love everyone but I am but one Sally who is tired, broke, likes to be independent/on her own with a guilt complex and hate sounding like I'm conceited or something. Many people tease me by imitating me by saying "ohhh i'm so pretty and popular. my life is so hard. People want to be around me and everyone wants to be my friend but i just dont have the time..." That's NOT me and actually legitlly gripes me. grrrrrr

2.) Crazy Little Thing Called Love: I've been the only singleton in my circle of friends for like ever. And then in my famliy. And then it branched out to work. I dont want to be in a couple just to be in a couple and i certainly don't want to turn into one those couples (sorry this is directed at most of you) who do everything together and act like they will simply die or freak out if the other half is not involved. Gimme a break already! It's awful to admit but I wish I were in a couple just to show others how you can balance love and life without making your love your life and kicking your friends to the backburner esp if they have a busy schedule. Then there are my few single friends who are on the opposite side of the spectrum and they just won't shutttt the fuuuuuckkkk uppppp about thier 'bad luck' or this guy/girl that they're totally crushing and how so and so texted them/wrote on their wall/told a mutual friend ____. I'm like ohhhhhh my gosh. You're not pathetic BECAUSE you're single. You're pathetic AND single. Knock it off!

It's the next day and I'm reading what I wrote. Man I get cranky when I don't get a lot of sleep! LoL the funny thing is I'm still not backing down completely from my arguments and im fully rested. Is that bad? Hm...