Tuesday, June 21, 2011


Greetings from a very sleep deprived and bugged out Sally.

Today is an ettiquette lesson from yours truly.

Telephone Manners. And by telephone, you nkow I mean cell phone, smart phone, i phone...etc.

Maybe the following rules don't apply to you and it's not something you care about BUT if you wanna stay connected with me? Play ball.

Rules (in no particular order)
1.) Don't text a phone conversation: Just dont. I dont want to get 5 texts from you, start to reply after the first one and then you bombard me and interupt with 4 more texts. Pick up the damn phone, make it a 5 minute convo (for those of you who hate talking on the phone).

2.) Don't send 10 one word texts: Okay so i totally get that sometimes your phone will send a text before you meant for it to. Shit happens. Totally legit. BUT.When it starts being like this:
"Haven't talked to you in a while."
"Just thinkin bout you."
"Hope all is well."
"Let me know if you wanna hangout smetime"
"Miss you!"

3.) Don't text me something juicy and then not pick up the call when the person calls you back immediately after you sent it unless you reallllllly can't.
Ex: "Got my pregnancy test results. OMG FML!!!"

Phone offender (is person B):
A: "What are you up to tonight?"
B: (no response)
A: "hellloooo?"
B: (No response)
A: "ok...maybe another time..."
B: "OMG Remember that time at the beach with that crazy homeless person? i thought i saw the same person yesterday!"

T R I F L I N'

If you have plans or don't wanna see person A for whatever reason, just fucking say so. Or follow example below:

Proper way to handle the sitch:
A: "What are you up to tonight?"
B: (no response)
A: "hellloooo?"
B: (No response)
A: "ok...maybe another time..."
B: "Ahhh sorry I didn't hit you back last night! I feel asleep b/c im lame and old..."

5.) If you push reject...the person on the other end is gonna know. Period. End of story. I'm sorry but let's not even pretend like we don't know. This is breakdown for my clueless (which hopefully is none of you...!)
-Phone goes straight to vm--they're in a shitty area with no reception or their phone is off/died.
-Phone rings and rings and rings and then voicemail: either theey legitly missed your call or are too polite to reject *Note: if on a business call/phone interview or breaking up, TOTALLY acceptable to hit reject
-Phone rings 2-3 times and then rolls to vm: My friend, you have been DENIED! Don't take it personally. It could be for any given reason like the few i mentioned above.
I was gonna keep going but as I mentioned earlier (or at least i think i did) i'm sleep deprived and exhausted. Possible TBD but i think i've hit some main points.


Monday, June 20, 2011


I'm freaking out. I can't believe I'm still freaking out. Not in a bad way and not in a good way--just a general laskdjflsakdjfalskdjfsadkjf FML.

It's finally come to this. Later than sooner but isn't that how it always goes?

I'm about to finally have another 'final' talk with someone. Someone who probably doesn't appreciate that i'm throwing out our biznass into cyberland like this. But i can't function right now and what does a sally do best under pressure? Bitch, smoke, write. In that order.

I love this person genuinely and sincerely and fiercely. But at some point, as my big bro said earlier--somethings gotta give. I think i've bounced my thoughts off of far more people than I intended to (but not too many) and I've come to the epiphany that maybe i kept asking around b/c i didn't know if i was just crazy or the person i talked to was just crazy or what.

I'm scared outta my mind but more anxious and determined. Everything will be fine and my predicition will probably be spot on:
1. I will freak out and almost back out
2. I'll follow through
3. It won't be poorly received b/c i know the person on the other end, despite his worst days and poorest of wording, will not annihilate me when it comes to things like this. Or we would've been done LONNNNG ago.
4. A round of I told you so's (REALLY not looking forward to that) along with passive aggressive ways of telling me I wasted my time
5. I'll feel better but still kinda be miserable only at this point i've talked it into the ground and then some that people I will not verbalize it b/c i dont feel like anyone understands.

Wish me luck. I'll need it.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Under Pressure


That feels better.

I love writing. I do. I really do. I love writing, I love my blog and I love all my readers--even those of you who I dont actually know. I appreciate your dedication to reading and the support. And I hate to say this but I do like that some of my unknown readers are from other countries--I'm like cool! I'm international bitchessssss hahaha

What i don't love is I feel like I dont always know what to say...And havent for some time. And it's not even that I don't have stories. Puh-leasee. If you know anything about me it's that I'm full of these crazy wacky stories that are unfortunately true stories LOL

Unfortunately as the fan base (for lack of a better word) grows, I feel more nervous about writing. Well..obviously not that much more nervous since I'm writing right now but you know what i mean. I feel like I need to be funnier than my last post or more poignant or meaningful. Do I start using code names? Can i bitch about my friends who i know read this even if I use code names? I have some good stories from work but I can't write about work in case someone from work stumbles upon this. I dont know. I know i know... WTF is Sally talking about and where's the funny shit? Scroll scroll scroll. hahah

Blahhhhhhhh i dont know. Until I figure it out, read an old blog since the last one I left you all with was totally depressing. I didn't mean for it to be but sometimes life is shitty (but not always for long!)

Okay. I'm making myself go to bed. My brain is totally fried. I think it's because I've been in "GO!" mode for the past 2 months. Wedding madnss, Camping madness, almost getting arrested madness, Birthday madness--I barely remember sleeping!

Yeah this was totally pointless and i shouldn't hit "publish post" but i am b/c i try my best to keep it real. Til next time readers (if i still have any left...LOL) i've got a benadryl with my name on it so i can pass the fuck out. Night!