Dust Yourself Off and Try Again

Fail. One of my new year's resolution was almost like a challenge to myself which is to blog literally every single day. Not always too in depth but throw something up every single day.

Given that it's halfway through Feb and I only have one post, which I didnt write, I think it's safe to say it's a total fail. But you know, at the same time, who said the year had to start with Jan 1? So what if the calendar year starts with Jan 1, doesnt mean that I have to also.

I know, Sally, you rebel you.

So here I am, dusting myself off and trying again.

Today was amusing. I realized halfway during the day that I was NOT capable of shutting the fuck up. My coworkers kindly humored me but I'm sure they were like SHUT THE FUCK UP SALLY. Even if they didn't say it to my face.

Oh Balls (which btw is totes my new fav saying). And here I go on another tangent of nothingness.

One of my coworkers said to me "Sally H. Pak." (Yes, dear readers, I did just reveal my last name. Come after me and I will have the police on you SOQUICK.)

To which I responded "How did you know that was my middlename?!" Then shortly thereafter said "No..not really. I don't have a middle name."

Said coworker pondered this for a moment and then said "That's right, it's b/c you're Asian."

WHAT!? I really do wonder sometimes...

I don't hold it against him. I learned at the gym today that my own peope are quite ignorant as well. The following below is a rough transcript of my interaction. And OB = the old bitch I was talking to.

OB *taps me on the shoulder* : EXCUSE ME.
Me *sighs noisly and takes headphones off*: Yes?
OB: You can't wear shoes in the dry sauna.
Me: Yes I can and there's nothing that says I cant.
OB: YOU CANT WEAR SHOES IN THE SAUNA. YOU ARE KILLING EVERYONE WITH THE GLUE IN YOUR SHOES.
Me: *narrows my eyes at her in annoyance* I dont generally keep glue in my shoes and what about your flip flops?
OB: What country you from?
Me: I'm from...
OB: You half Chinese half white?
Me: No, I'm
OB: ARE YOU SPANISH AND ASIAN?
Me: I'm Korean.
OB: ME TOO. *switches to speaking in korean* You dont look Korean.
Me: *also switches to Korean* Yep. I am.
OB: But your LEGS are muscular. Very sturdy.
Me: Yep. I work out.
OB: Korean people have VERY skinny legs. Your legs are STRONG. NOT FAT. STRONG.
Me: Well. I'm still korean...
OB: You SURE?
Me: WHAT?
(mind you i'm speaking to her in korean this whole convo is in korean...)
OB: But Korean legs are like toothpicks. See? I'm over 60 and my legs are SKINNY. B/c i am KOREAN.
Me: *overly sweetly* Youre right. Your legs are skinny like Korean people. But you're also fat. Most Koreans aren't. Maybe YOU'RE not korean BECAUSE YOURE FAT.
OB: HOW DARE YOU TALK TO YOUR ELDER LIKE THIS? DO YOUR PARENTS GO HERE?
*me momentarily picturing my parents chasing me around screaming SHAME, Sally. SHAME. Then I realize, you know what? I'm damn near 30*
Me: I talk however I want to and yes, my parents do go here. They're Korean and NOT FAT.

Stony silence. Both of us are STUBBORN bitches at this point so neither of us want to be the first to leave the sauna. She's about 100 years old and I know she's about give out first. I may be a smoker but I work out like a champ and KNOW I can outlast here. And if home girl thinks for one second she's going to intimidate me out of here, she MUST be confused. I will stay here until i resemble dehyrdrated space food or until I pass out or DIE.

2 minutes later she leaves.

VICTORY IS MINE!