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Saturday, August 3, 2013

Time.

Time--it let's you know what point of the day it is and a crappy Hootie and the Blowfish song.

They say it heals all. They also say that it's short. It's also precious I'm told. What else they neglected to mention that I would like to make crystal clear today is that while people are obsessing over money and power, time is literally one of the few things in life that once it's gone, it is GONE my friends. You can NOT get it back. You can earn more money or be given money or whatever and power you can lose and possibly regain but time is a done deal. It is what it is.

That being said, time has been on my mind for three specific reasons lately.

1.) Dad. I feel like I'm slowing starting to do better but it' s not easy. Recently I changed jobs and naturally when you get to know your co-workers, typically if you're in the 'younger' crowd, people ask about your family, specifically parents. I haven't breathed a word to them and really don't plan on it. I've glossed over it and speak about him in the present tense (habit) but keep it light and keep it moving. Luckily, no one pushes it. I've always heard about when people pass away people say that they think of their departed loved ones literally every day. It's not that I didn't believe it before but experiencing it first hand is like... a whole new understanding. It's nuts. It doesn't bog down my day or anything but every day I can't help but think of my dad and wish he was still alive--father's day almost killed me with grief.

2.) My new commute. There's literally nothing I can do about it b/c more then pure volume of cars, it's the traffic light ever 2 feet thing. My first week I was BUGGIN the fuck OUT. But as I said earlier, there's nothing you can really do about time. Now i'm using that time as time to call others and catch up that way, sing in my car or just regroup. Granted there is a good bit of ugliness that escapes my mouth when people drive like morons which happens EVERYDAY but I'm kinda proud that I haven't let this hellish commute deter me from moving forward in my career. I know what the commute is so thinking of new ways to not pay attention to the time is helpful..and i'm definitely open to more suggestions haha talking on my phone (via bluetooth in the car which i feel like EVERYONE should have) or books on tape (which i need to find/buy) have been helpful. Also singing. But yeah open to more suggestions haha

3.) INCONSIDERATE/IGNORANCE ABOUT TIME. Look I get it. Shit happens and you're late. Traffic sucks, your dog gets sick, metro is down, weird freakish accident etc. Happens to all of us. ALL OF US.Or you're just by nature a late person. BUT. Guess what, your shit happens pass is only valid once or twice per season on a case by case scenario. And if you're late by nature GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER LIKE AN ADULT because guess what? You end up wasting my fucking time which i SINCERELY don't appreciate. I'll accept fault in that I don't let people know just how badly it irritates me but I think I need to start showing people the diva bitch because THIS diva bitch is SICK of people WASTING my time. Because YOU wasting my time, also makes ME waste other people's time. So if you're 15-30 minutes late, my plans AFTER YOU are now going to be pushed. Don't waste my time PERIOD. I'm fortunate to have a lot of people in my life that I can hang out with and spend time with but YOU being a selfish ASSHOLE and holding my shit up, fucks up my day time wise. In all fairness a majority of the time, the people who have to be pushed back understand it's not my fault but that's not going to get their time back nor is it mine. I always try to be considerate and give notice if I even THINK im going to be late. Learn to do the same. If not, guess what, you're totally getting bumped off my list or I will hang out with you very rarely. And it's not b/c i'm a diva bitch--i think everyone else should bump you off their list too until you can GROW UP. Like for fuck's sake it's not that hard. I guess I'm mostly irritated by this because I keep getting the short stick and this hasn't ruined friendships and i would like to think it won't be a deal breaker but i've had this happen to me more this summer than any other time. Like I'm not trippin out about 10-15 and maaybe 20 minutes. And i'm not calculating the time that I waited if i got somewhere early (i.e. if we said we'd meet at 1pm and I get there at 12:45pm. My diva bitch clock doesn't start until 1pm or even 1:10pm.). I'm talking 30 minutes plus. Are you fucking kidding me? No longer so b/c this bitch don't find it funny. Get a watch bitches. Look at your mutha fuckin' phone.

Time is all that's guaranteed in life. Period.